October Canary Awards and a couple Kudos

October was a month of canary nominations.  Lots of politicians, Sports teams, individuals, organizations....
I had only a little trouble narrowing it down, however.

So, it's TIME TO GIVE 3 NOMINEES "THE BIRD!"

And despite all the jackasses nominated in the POLITICAL department, nobody got the bird...THIS TIME.

The Bronze Canary goes to THE NY YANKEES who, despite one HORRENDOUS finish, throttled the Twins out of the playoffs....only to Fall to TX in the second round.  Once again, I laugh at the Yankees for being huge spendthrifts and getting nothing in return.

The SILVER Canary -- goes to Zygi Wilf, Brad Childress, Brett Favre, and the entire Vikings team.  You guys were just STUPID to bring in Moss -- I knew he wouldn't last!  4 games -- Such BRILLIANCE, guys!
The Vikings are on their way to a 2-14 season, Favre is throwing interception after interception, and the teams that the Vikings can beat are dreadful!

The GOLD Canary -- goes to a bunch of idiot lawyers who shall remain nameless here.  You fools actually thought that suing my wife would get you some money, huh?  Well, it didn't work -- she's judgement proof, and now the final results are just a short time away.  YOU HAVE LOST, and you won't get a thing because you've driven us back into bankruptcy.  I'm thankful we have 3 lawyers on our side to battle your lies!
So, once again, HSBC and their Lackeys grab a GOLD CANARY!

And for those of you who were watching the World Series, I give a KUDOS to Texas -- despite falling to SF, you have proved that you have the stuff!

And to San Francisco, I say CONGRATS... 56 years between World Series Championships is a long time.

So, the Canaries are flying high -- and the Kudos move to some good places:  AS I SEE IT!

September, time for AUGUST Canaries!

Absurdity! Absurdity! It's time to issue a Canary or three!

Not Dog, nor cat, nor horse, nor rabbit... I'm in the CANARY HABIT!

Ah, August was a FINE MONTH for nominees for the Canary awards! From a debt collector, to the Govt, to the Mortgage company, to a guy on Twitter, to the weather, to the power company, to the Satellite Company, to the Phone Company, to the anesthesiologist... OH, I had nominees galore.

It wasn't too hard to determine who was gonna get the BIRD. The question was who was gonna get WHICH bird.

While the weather caused a lot of problems last month (Tearing off the roof, wrecking a carport, leaving us without power for 41 hours, without phone service for 72 hours, and without satellite service for 60 hours, the weather STILL came in a distant fourth place.

Third place goes to a MORON whom I will not mention by name. He's a real jerk on Twitter. I thought there was hope for him, but I find I was wrong. This half-wit thinks that FAITH and FICTION are the same thing, seems to think if you can't quantify something it doesn't exist.

Well, I'm gonna respond to that: You can't see the stars in the day time. Therefore they don't exist. You can't see AIR. Therefore it doesn't exist. You can't see his brain, so it doesn't exist. (OH, I'm sorry -- he doesn't HAVE a brain, so it's obvious why you can't see it!)

To this fool, I want to point out that FAITH is a belief. SURE, you can believe in something that is an error. YOU have faith in Medical science. You believe that when you go to a physician, that he can cure you of what ails you. And just what happens when you are wrong?

I CAN'T SEE YOU, YOU do NOT EXIST, buddy! Bronze Canary for whatever your name is. I have NO REASON to believe that you told me the truth about your name. (SEE, that's my FAITH in action. My faith is in your lack of honesty!)

Second place gets the silver canary! And our all inclusive favorite "Debt collectors" get one this month. I was waiting for someone to come examine the house for repair work after the big storm. I see someone pull into the drive (Which is marked NO TRESPASSING), but I knew the insurance adjuster had my permission. To my surprise, it was a F***ing ass who was trying a door-to-door harassment approach to debt collection. I chased him off, told him "I have no time to talk to you. If you come back, I'll have you up on charges of Trespass." While I've not seen him since, I suspect he will return. And I will have the police out here in a matter of minutes!

And our illustrious GOLD CANARY, for the group I want to give the BIRD...goes to Mn School District 912! Since I moved to this area, I have voted down 8 times a proposed levy to "help" the schools around here. 7 times they've had the question on the ballot, one year they had it twice. I've voted it down 3 times in the last 2 years. And sure enough, these "TAX AND SPEND" jerks are at it again, Trying to get us to raise our property taxes for "The kids." But the thing is, they are spending A hundred Thousand trying to get us to raise the taxes! Why don't they stop trying to get us to raise our taxes and spend that money on THE KIDS? Because these morons on fundamentally STUPID, and their evil goes beyond sanity, beyond the darkest imagining of Stephen King! Raise my taxes? NO, NO, A THOUSAND TIMES NO, AND YOU WILL LOSE AGAIN, AS LONG AS I LIVE IN MN DISTRICT 912!

There you have it -- the Canary awards for August. If you have nominations, send 'em, and your explanation why they deserve a canary award. Who knows, maybe I'll give them THE BIRD for YOU!

The JUNE Canaries! Gotta love 'em!

GOTTA LOVE those Canary awards. Last month, I issued none because I just didn't have enough nominees to make it worth while. (Remember, I issue for the previous month. June would be May's canary awards)

Today is July 2nd, and I had more than enough nominees to fill the bill and make a canary tweet.

So, who is gonna get THE BIRD?

For 3rd place, The PRESIDENT gets a canary. Spending too much time on the golf course, not enough on the oil spill in the Gulf, and his nomination of Kagan for the SCOTUS. Buddy, why don't you DO SOMETHING, instead of sitting on your duff, or working on your Golf Swing. Maybe Tiger Woods can offer some tips on your game, but I'm afraid you need a BRAIN to work with the rest of the stuff. But I don't think Tiger is going to be able to offer any celibacy tips. If he does, he's barking up the wrong tree.

The SILVER Canary goes to "Enhanced Recovery Systems," one of our famous, hated enemies.

They tried to collect a "Debt," upon which requested validation. They received our letter, but within 15 days (And without validating) they sold it to someone else. I've not been able to establish any connection between ERS and the winner of June's Canary (The Gold Canary)

The Winner of the GOLD CANARY is the company to which ERS sold the "Debt," to which we STILL have received no validation. I grant you, they still have a little time (to the 15th) to gather and send the information. But we requested validation from THEM, as well. The Group "West Asset Management" still has a few days to get this stuff to us (IF they can gather it). And if we don't receive the requested info, they will have to withdraw the claim. (And I WILL report both ERS and WEST to the Dept. of Commerce for the state. I did that LAST time (For NCO and Transworld), and they were forced to withdraw the claim IN WRITING. I don't know what my success average will be at the end of this month, but I know it will be no less than 50%. And batting 500 is still pretty darned good.

So, you got the "Winners"-- who are actually LOSERS -- In our CANARY AWARDS -- Losers, all: AS I SEE IT!

Canary awards--the worst of the worst.

It's May 1st, and that means it's time for our monthly canary awards. This is one canary the cat can't swallow. (Please, no bird jokes -- I don't like the idea of bird jokes being parroted -- because they either take wing or lay an egg!)

For those of you who are familiar with the Canary, you know it to be a takeoff on TEM'S "Hoover Award." I've not seen much of it recently, so I just use the canary to give people or organizations -- the unpalatable types, unsavory types -- the bird.

So, who's getting the Bird for the Month of April?

There were a half-dozen deserving of it. Usually, they're bill collectors, fools, and sometimes Government agencies (See last month for the only 3 Govt. Entities award ceremony in the history of the Canary Award.

This month is more "Normal" in the giving of the bird.

It was kind of difficult to pin down the order, however.

The Bronze Canary goes to FAIRVIEW HEALTH SERVICES (Billing Dept). Not responding to letters, inquiries, ignoring payments that were made, sending threats, and attempted extortion.

I've got a lawyer on this, and I'm following his advice. Thing is, Fairview failed to credit more than 200 in payments since the start of the year, and they've been threatening me with "Collections." REALITY CHECK -- I've proved they aren't owed 1/2 of what they claim. They have a LOT of explaining to do with the legal system, methinks.

The Silver Canary... It's our old friend the Bill collectors -- I recently discovered that a company that send a demand is actually the parent company of another company. THAT company had ALSO send a demand. I requested Validation. They did not. They're trying again. I requested validation AGAIN. Time's up. If I don't get it by the 5th (post mark no later than the 1st of May) they will have to withdraw the claim or face the wrath of the FTC and an attorney. They were supposed to prove validity in 30 days. They didn't last time. It looks like they'll fail THIS time, too. Who's the company, who's the parent? The first one is called "TRANSWORLD," and the parent is "NCO". It looks as if they've lost out, and I've already taken the liberty of reporting them to the FTC, a lawyer, and I have the Email address for the Minnesota licensing agency ready for a complaint. The ain't gonna weasel out of this one!

Although Juniper came in 4th, and very close... I have to award the GOLD CANARY to the biggest fools in History -- HOUSEHOLD BANK. When my wife was in the hospital, I tried to contact them to tell them... they refused to note the account, claiming that they had to talk to her. I tried 5 times, I think it was. I finally resorted to a letter, which was ignored, and a threat sent. I tried again, via letter -- INCLUDING CERTIFIED MAIL... oh, they answered -- but they refuse to acknowledge the situation, they do not answer the questions, they merely tell us to "CALL US." They then threaten again. Why are they so afraid to put anything in writing? We could record the whole thing, but what good would that do? Nothing. Calling the lawyer! He's got the info, and we're waiting to find out WTF gives with these morons at HSBC.

I don't know who's going to get the BIRD for MAY...but I'm almost willing to bet that HSBC, JUNIPER, and NCO will be right in there, again. And next time, I won't be so kind...because I've already reached the end of my rope.

Yep, the BIRD has been awarded, once again... to everybody's Favorites...or is it "NOT SO FAVORITES?" And I can bet they'll be back...They just LOVE getting the BIRD.... AS I SEE It!

Canary Awards for MARCH!

In this world of the absurd, the time has come to give the bird...12 nominees, who will it be...One more time for a canary!

I LOVE Canary awards. It's a great way to say how you feel -- giving someone the BIRD. And THIS is truly an unusual month for Canaries!

12 nominees...including 2 credit card companies, 2 insurance companies, 2 collection agencies...You GOT to know who's getting 'em RIGHT? I mean, Household is going to grab one, RIGHT?

THAT's what makes this month unusual...not a single bill collector, not a single credit card company gets the bird this month...although some were close.

So WHO is getting the bird? If not Household, not Progressive, not NCO or ERC?

It's SO appropriate that this month starts with shouts of APRIL FOOL and ends with shouts of MAYDAY!

BRONZE CANARY: Our Illustrious leader himself, Barack Insane O-Blame-ya.

His heavy-handed tactics and general creepiness have set this country on the path to Communism with a heavy dose of Islamic Jihad thrown in for good measure.

SILVER CANARY--This one was easy after giving the Bronze to the President. Yeah, He deserves the bird, but another Bird goes to our "Take it all Away" Government. Our "noble" Congress (GOP and 34 DFLers excepted) are deserving of THE BIRD. Pushing through Obamacare, forcing people who can't afford insurance to buy it...taking away from those who earn their living only to have it given to someone else...

Death Panels now forming, folks. Get in now, you might be able to get a job later. MAYBE even health care. But right now, it looks as if the Morons are still in power...although we can hope for better results in November.

OH, yes... I must NOT FORGET our GOLD CANARY. Waste, fraud, bullshit... yep, this organization/branch of government is being awarded the BIRD. The CENSUS BUREAU!

One guy I know received 4 post cards from them...wanting info. This is a ONE FAMILY HOUSE, why the hell are they sending 4 cards? They're demanding the stuff back BEFORE the date given on the first question! They want people who are in the house/residence as of 4-1, but they want it back before 4-1 is even reached? What kind of Moronity is that?

They're demanding your FULL NAME, PHONE, BIRTHDAY, RACE... Why is Birthday so damned important? All the census really needs is NUMBER OF PEOPLE, GENDERS, and MAYBE ages.

They sure as hell ain't getting a phone number out of me. I'm not giving 'em a B-day. They don't need it. As for "RACE"-- well, I'm HUMAN. If they don't like it, they can LUMP it!

So, it's a first: An ALL GOVERNMENT CANARY AWARD CEREMONY. It'll be back to normal next month, I guess. And Since the Census can only win a couple of times a decade, I guess it's already on the path to another.

That's THIS MONTH'S Canary awards-- Govt. Issue! AS I SEE IT!

CANARY AWARDS FOR FEBRUARY!

AH, the So-special CANARY AWARD. Many are nominated, but only 3 are chosen...:)

You all know by now why I give the Canary award -- it's to the people I want to give THE BIRD! Yeah, and there are LOTS of them, believe me. But February was quite quiet when it came to nominees. Just a few, and now I got my awards all chosen.

For the BRONZE CANARY, I have to award it to FARMER'S INSURANCE. Why? They canceled the policy back in January, and didn't notify us until the end of February. Actually, we learned about it in MARCH, but the date was enough to include those BASTARDS in the canary awards. Folks, might I suggest that if you use them, that you CHANGE COMPANIES? They deserve to be put OUT OF BUSINESS, rather than to get business. So, I award them the BIRD. (BY THE WAY, THE CO-RECIPIENT is CITIMORTGAGE, which requested the cancellation)

The second place (SILVER CANARY) goes to my beloved auto-insurance company -- for a whopping 90% increase in premium. We won't change for now. We really need to stay with them for a year before we change. But if the price drops in August, I may decide to rescind the bird....but until then...

And -- Do you REALLY need to ask? -- the WINNER of the GOLD CANARY -- The place I MOST WANT TO GIVE THE BIRD -- Is going to ... HOUSEHOLD BANK! (I could have chosen Juniper, but I think household was more deserving of getting the BIRD. I tried to deal with them in January and early February -- trying to tell them my wife was in the hospital and there wasn't any money to pay bills. The morons kept sending me canned answers, refusing to acknowledge the situation. So, the HP division was sent a letter to which they have not yet given an answer. But they decided to get an award for March, too. They're already nominated. It REALLY gets boring giving them THE BIRD constantly! But next month, they're going to be out of luck, as most other places will be. UNLESS, that is, I win the lottery tonight or tomorrow. DREAM ON! But if I DO win it, it will pay off the house FIRST, then the taxes, and bills. If anything is left, I'll get some propane. :)

No, there really IS NO CONTEST when it comes to who gets the bird...and one more time, and a huge run -- it goes to HOUSEHOLD BANK...for a nice little "Gold Bird". Maybe, someday, they realize it's FOOL'S GOLD. LOL.

January canary awards!

Yep, it's February. My house was stolen right out from under me, my wife suffered a heart attack, we're having another cold snap, and I'm as frustrated as a a lying bastard spouting globabble.

Today being 2-1, that means it is time for your favorite and mine THE CANARY AWARDS!

I've explained it more than once... the CANARY is THE AWARD...for people whom you want to give the bird! It could be a politician, a cop, a neighbor, a sports team... it makes NO DIFFERENCE.

I had 6 nominees this last month. I had to sort out the worst of the worst to determine who was getting the BIRD.

So, let's give this dubious distinction this month -- to those to whom I REALLY want to give the bird!

Bronze canary -- the third place finish... goes to my local bank. They denied me a loan, citing a foreclosure that had not yet taken place. Thing is, it was only a SMALL one. They would have had it back in 2 days. They refused, instead stealing 60 from my account. Well, they won't be having my business much longer...

The Silver Canary -- For Folding above and beyond the call of duty, and playing "Give away"...Goes to everyone's favorite loser: The Minnesota Vikings. They kept giving the ball away to N.O., so it's no wonder they lost It just goes to show that, when the going gets tough, the Vikings fold. I guess that's why they plan on changing their name to the Folders next yet. They thought about the Minnesota Tampons -- but they decided it was too "Girlish".

And The GOLD CANARY-- the people that I most want to give THE BIRD...Is there any doubt at all? Nope. It's the Folks at HSBC...in their HP division. When my wife had a heart attack, I contacted them via Email, asking them to note her account. They refused, claiming "We can only give information to the account holder." That's all fine, but THE DAMNED BASTARDS ARE TOO STUPID TO REALIZE THAT I WASN'T ASKING FOR INFORMATION.

I tried to tell them THAT, they sent the same "canned" response. 5 times in all... the F***ing bastards want a signed letter from her. I asked them "HOW CAN I GIVE YOU THAT IF SHE'S IN A COMA?" What do they say? "We're sorry, but we can only discuss details with the account holder." BUT I WASN'T ASKING FOR DETAILS!

Stupid idiots. They, once again, get the BIRD!

February is a short month...but I'm sure there's going to be some action on the board this month.

YEP, That's the truth -- AS I SEE IT!

Canary awards, year-end canaries, and Thank yous.

Sitting there upon the shelf,

like an old, mischievous elf

Sit 3 statues, bronze, silver, and Gold...

They are canaries, And I am bold.

I shall give the Bird to three,

for December, and year-end, you see.

It doesn't matter if you're not a turd,

I could STILL give you the BIRD!

Forgive me if I don't give you a New Year's Greeting.

I don't see happiness on the horizon for anyone, and it makes me a hypocrite if I wish someone something I don't foresee.

December is over, as is one of my worst years. Coupled with Job loss, disability, medical problems, insurance problems, and foreclosure, a new year of trouble is just what's needed. So, to get it off my chest, so to speak, I will award the BIRD to 3 troublemakers for December, Plus a SPECIAL 3 for the year of 2009. But I'll temper the bad with some thank yous to the people who made 2009 a little more bearable.

The Bronze Canary (And it's no surprise) goes to Household Bank -- for annoying letters, stupidity, and threats. We have our solution ready, folks. But YOU ain't gonna like it. YOU are a bunch of A-holes who don't deserve to live, but we have no right to kill you.

The Silver Canary -- might shock you. It goes to the Local Police. I realize you're just doing your job, but sitting in our driveway for 2 hours plus is ridiculous. If I had had enough money, I would have called someone to put a boot on the car and have it towed. Harassment is not permitted by law, but harassment is part of your "job", so I have to say YOU GET THE BIRD.

And the GOLD CANARY -- the people I most want to give the BIRD...the morons at CITIMORTGAGE. Well, it should be obvious -- I mentioned the problem. But after sending us a damn foreclosure, you have the AUDACITY to send someone out to pound on the door?

What ARE YOU, MORONS? You jackasses don't give a flying pig about the people who are disabled, or injured. It's loan sharks like you who should be run out of town on a rail after being tarred and feathered.

So, that's the December Canaries... The most canaries go to HOUSEHOLD Bank for 2009. Enjoy them, bastards.

Year-end canaries-- it doesn't necessarily mean people who've won them for the last year. Nor does it mean Nominated. But in THIS CASE, it fits either/or.

It wasn't difficult to determine finalists, but to determine order of finish. And although there were lots of finalists, only 3 got the top three. And some are getting left out, but they deserve th BIRD. So, I give a STEEL CANARY to those unmentioned who deserve to get the BIRD.

The Bronze Canary -- goes to CONGRESS AND THE PRESIDENT... for screwing the people, lying about what's being done, forcing us to pay for health care when we can't afford it as it is, lying about global warming, and General Incompetence. Reid, Pelosi, Franken, Obama, and other boobs get this dubious award... Just remember, The Precious metal in THE BIRD doesn't make it better for you folks.

The SILVER CANARY goes to two LYING EX-BOSSES who had it in for me from the start.

Wanda and Michael are two damned idiots, Michael is a club-handed, club-footed pinhead who doesn't realize that he cannot order someone around when that person is NOT ON DUTY. The asshole deserves to burn in hell, with his body reserved for an unmarked grave -- preferably the trash can. Wanda is just a fool who thinks she's god. These delusions of grandeur are aumented by her position of Power within the company, and she's narcissistic. She's an egomaniac of proportions unheard of even by Sigmund Freud!

And the GOLD CANARY... Oh, how I'd love to flip them the bird -- goes to the law enforcement officials around these parts. Listening to lying jackasses like Mr. C., Mr. H, and the local vets, the jackasses throw me in cuffs for no damned reason (It's given me a phobia), sitting in the driveway, harassing us over non-existent crimes...It's enough to make me throw up ON GOVERNMENT PROPERTY.

So, there you have the Canary awards. Now, I want to issue some "Thank yous" to some of the folks who tried to make my life bearable:

My brother-in-law, Mark, and sister Darlene...for their sympathetic ears and eyes...and a checkbook that's open. If it wasn't for them, I would be fully lost.

My wife -- for sticking with me in hard times.

For the folks at Twitter -- those who try to make me laugh, to see the good...even when there is little good to see. People like "Fartingduck", and "Theladywrites"(Who beat on Donny Osmond for Tweet-wall position. Congrats, Cat!) who manage to try spreading cheer even in the worst of circumstances.

Even in these hard times, when nothing seems to go right, or when problems follow in rapid succession, sometimes there are some bright spots...angels, if you will, who help you through.

If someone didn't get thanked, and deserves it, don't take it personally. I'm tired. I want more sleep, but doubt that I'll get much over the next 27 days.

Actively awarding canaries!

November 1st, 2009. Nominations for October Canary awards are closed.

Of all the awards given under the sun, The CANARY award is both BRUTAL and FUN.

So join the countdown; it will not get old. Let's award the Canaries, Bronze, Silver and GOLD.

What a month for nominations for canaries! I mean REALLY. I had 10 in the first 10 days, and picked up 10 more by the end of the month. ONE organization got TWO nominations! (That is a first for the canary!)

The DFL got a nomination (For Obamacare), the Nobel committee (for their pathetic attempt at pandering to Obama) 2 insurance companies, a local bank, a local medical provider organization, The President, collection agencies, a credit card... well, you get the idea. I had NO PROBLEM choosing the Biggest hassle. I quickly eliminated Cuzzi (the umpire who screwed up a call in the Twins/Yankees series), the Yankees, and some minor annoyances. I finally trimmed the list to 5 "Losers."

The only way to give everyone their due is to use a "Dishonorable Mention," and this month it includes 2 of them. Hopefully, the HIGH Nomination will drop off now.

In a tie for the Dishonorable Mention award, my local bank and the FAIRVIEW organization. The Bank refused to cash a check for us (although it was not from our account), even though the check was from a well respected law firm. It made our situation even tighter than it should have been. But it doesn't deserve the BIRD, but a fruit call (Raspberry).Fairview also gets a fruit call for a double nomination, submitting bills to the wrong companies, and a LATE DEBT VALIDATION. (They had 30 days to get it here, it took closer to 60. I am in consultation about that)

So, who gets the Bronze Canary? This month, this no-so prestigious award has to go to the DFL party. Their constant harassment over "OBAMACARE" is a pain. Did you know it will boost taxes, and force people who cannot afford it to buy it and pay a penalty to boot? The taxes would start nearly immediately, but no benefits would be received for 3 years. So, you get a new tax right away (which will push more people into the poor house), while giving illegals the right to govt. run insurance (No citizenship proof is required. This is NOT good) The plans won't go into effect until 3 years after it's signed (if it's passed and signed), so that's 3 nice years of extra taxes for the working folk. So, the DFL gets the BIRD.

The Silver Canary goes to our local fuel co-op. We use propane, and they decided (Without warning) to stick us on the "Pay on Delivery" plan. This arbitary decision on their part really sticks it to us in the wallet. While I can't blame them for the decision, they did not notify us. That earns them the SILVER CANARY. I extend my disdain for the company, and award them THE BIRD.

Do I REALLY need to tell you who won the GOLD CANARY? It's everybody's favorite to hate: HOUSEHOLD BANK! I was documenting calls from them since the 13th. To the 30th, from this jackass group, we received 72 calls, over 60 after the first request to stop, 13 after the second. For this constant violation of the FDCPA, refusal to stop, hanging up on us, giving us shit... I had no choice but to award them the Bird.

For Harassment, Household is in a class by itself. We're consulting an attorney. To apply a little of my favorite term from PHINEAS AND FERB: They're busted!

Some organizations... You can't live with 'em. You've gotta wish they'd disappear!

September Canary awards... gotta love 'em

It's October 2nd, and I'm running a bit behind in my works for the month. But that's the way it goes, I guess. So, let me get right down to it.

In this world of the absurd, it's time, now, to give the bird.
So into the Hall of Shame go we to issue our illustrious CANARY!

September was kind of a slow month for nominations to the Canary award, almost to the point where I didn't even have 3 nominations.
One nomination is already in for October, but that doesn't count.

Let's start with the Hall of Shame canary awards, Bronze canary.
The Bronze canary goes to our local vet clinic. They decided to cut off our access to local vet care. And why? Because we disputed an amount that they said we owed. They've lost. So they shut off our access in their clinics. Well, that's fine by me. They lied about us enough with false police reports, inadequate vet care, improper diagnosis. They lied, they lost, and they're sore losers. Typical.

Some of the debt collectors out there are still trying to collect from a dead man, by hounding us. Well, since we aren't the dead man, they are wasting their time. They can't collect from us since we don't even bear the same name as the deceased. Stupid folks, right? Constantly in violation of the Law, this group. If you ever have to deal with A.I.* just contact your attorney general, or dept. of commerce. Maybe both.
So, to A.I., we award the SILVER CANARY, for lies and harassment above and beyond the limit of law.

Finally, to our old insurance company, we must award the GOLD CANARY. Yep, This is the second month in a row that I've given them the bird. They canceled our car insurance without the slightest notice, and then the are trying to collect what we don't owe because of that cancelation. I'll be sending a dispute form to them shortly. They will lose.

Oh, and there's another one... A local, call him "C.C." Definately deserves a gold canary, as well. All in all, 4 awards, 2 Gold Canaries. Yes, I salute ALL of them by giving them "THE BIRD."

The first two nominees are already in for October, and we're only 2 days into the month. Our illustrious local bank is already tapped for the Gold Canary. They COULD lose out, if someone else proves more annoying.

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I must admit that today I don't know if I should be Flattered, or insulted.
A local store asked me if I was eligible for the "Senior Citizen Day" discount. I may LOOK old, but I'm not THAT old. Should I take it as an insult?
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Special HI to Twitter land. Big thank yous to my sister, and brother-in-law.
Gotta go... gotta see if the Twins can win the division. Wins are needed, losses for the Tigers. Twins fans, keep your fingers crossed!

CANARY AWARDS TIME!

HEY, EVERYONE! It's September 1, and you know what THAT means, right?

In this world of the absurd,

It's time for us to give "THE BIRD"

It's the award for you and Me

Let's now award

A CANARY!

I had my pics pretty much chosen a couple of weeks ago, then my Gold Canary winner showed up...and worked from 3rd all the way to first, while my original first place leader fell off to third. Kind of strange that it happened that way, but sometimes, no matter how much you try to predict, the strange happens.

I'll bring in the KUDOS awards after I've awarded the bird to three people.

If you're wondering where Household Bank is this month, they finished 4th, a "Dishonorable mention." Congrats for not making the top three.

3rd place this month came out of nowhere at the start of August, holding the top spot for over half a month.

The Bronze canary (Yes folks, I'm giving an insurance company the BIRD) falls to Farmer's insurance group. They canceled my auto insurance without warning, and plan to not renew the house insurance. Well, that's fine by me... THEN what do they do? They do a turn around and send a bill to the mortgage company. We've pretty much lost everything already, but you know money talks. And the threat seems to go by the way, but they might still cancel, and if they do the mortgage company gets stuck. Folks, I really wonder about those people. And, you guessed it -- they want 54 something on a canceled policy. Sorry, that won't wash.

The Silver Canary (Yes, I give these folks the bird, too) falls to JC CHRISTENSEN and Associates. Violating the law by calling 2 times after a CEASE OF COMMUNICATION was sent, AND still not giving me the information I requested to verify a debt, they've stooped low -- they have a couple of days yet to give me the info I requested, or lose out. Well, at the moment it looks like their going to be losers...but there IS a little time left. We shall see.

The GOLD CANARY-- The Biggest BIRD I CAN GIVE... falls to Juniper/Barclay Bank. They've called 34 times since the 27th, and started harassing us bank on the 16th. They've earned 2 complaints to the FTC, and one to the FCC. And since Robo-calls are now illegal, they've earned 9 criminal charges in the month of September! But I am not counting those yet. So, to the "Winners" above, I Issue a loud BRONX CHEER, and "THE BIRD" to all of them.

Kudos awards for August go to a small group of people on Twitter. They include the Role Players of "_SevenofNine", "Sharatheorion", "Tuvok_" and more. They give me enough fun to keep me going in these hard times.

That's it for today folks. Watch for the September Canary Awards to be issued in Early October. Be good -- and you won't get THE BIRD.

It's August 1st. And you know what THAT means!

Not including today, of course, my number is 47250.


NOW, it's August 1st, 2009. And you know what THAT means, don't you? That's right! It's time for EVERYBODY'S FAVORITE, THE CANARY AWARDS!


I also have KUDOS awards, but so many it's tough to mention three without missing someone.

So, let me try to run down a bunch... And if I miss someone, I apologize. I seldom have so many I need to mention.


The Kudos this last month go to:


Mark M., attorney: for encouragement, assistance, and a good swift kick, when needed.

Darlene W., for encouragement, assistance, and just being there. When God created sisters, He must have had her in mind.

Joyce R. For giving me things to talk about, and for the ability to go forward despite the odds.

The gang of RPers at Twitter, Including players like _SevenOfNine, Sharatheorion , Tuvok_, and Jean_Pierce, for putting up with my nuttiness.

Other people at Twitter such as ChicagoBungalow make my day.





NOW, for the Canary awards. Lots of nominees, but easy when you look at it. It's so simple. It's just the people or organizations that you want to give "THE BIRD.




The Bronze Canary, this month, goes to the Local Vet Clinic. One vet claimed one of our dogs wouldn't last a year. 2 years later, she's going strong. One vet claimed there was nothing wrong with the horses, but we've discovered they had worms. The vet, incompetent, cost us 2 horse lives, and more than 800 in court costs because of the lies of the clinic. No more!


The Silver Canary (With an additional visit from the FTC) goes to Financial Consultants Company, INC. One threatening letter after another has earned them a visit from the FTC. I HOPE they appreciate it.


Finally, the GOLD CANARY-- The company that I most want to give the BIRD... Goes to J.C. Christensen and Vultures of MN. These guys have earned a visit from the FTC, too. But when these guys don't LISTEN, it's not only annoying but down right pathetic. But what do you expect from these boobs? You can't expect compassion from vultures.

That rounds off my awards for July. My August awards my be a little late. We shall see.

JUNE CANARY AWARDS!

HEY FOLKS! It's time for everybody's favorite: THE CANARY AWARDS! While June was a slow month for nominations, but June and July are generally slow. But everyone had a nominee... I had several, and the question was WHO WAS GOING TO GET THE BIRD? I gave it plenty of thought, and then at the end of the month a new candidate emerged, grabbing the Gold Canary. The Dishonorable mention goes to Household bank,which finally signed its own death warrant by giving me their fax number. I hope the like the FTC on their tails! The Bronze Canary goes to JC CHRISTENSEN and ASSOCIATES...debt collectors DORK SUPREME! They've had THEIR business shut up, too...thanks to the Federal Trade Commission. The Silver Canary goes to Town And Country Finance here in this city. Now, maybe I can work in peace, since they've been told to SHOVE OFF. Oh, but the GOLD CANARY... The organization that REALLY DESERVES THE BIRD... Is the Minnesota Supreme Court. It took 'em a month to tell us that they were clowns by supporting a clown for the US SENATE. So while Minnesota has two senators (in membership), they are the most under-represented state in the union because they have two fools in the US Senate. There were other nominations: The US House for the "CRAP AND TAX" bill 2454. AL FRANKEN, the idiot who's been elected by the idiots of MN to the Senate....despite the obvious stupidity of the man. And several people who decided that Stupidity rules when it comes to reporting deaths of people...whether or not the deaths were REAL. I may start another award next month... I used to have a "Kudos" award. Maybe I'll have a Lutefisk award... Watch for the CANARY AWARD for July -- in Early August!

after a long Hiatus --Canary awards are BACK!

Some time ago, I had what I called the "Canary Award." Similar to the "Hoover Award" that was ocassionally awarded by the Blogger who runs "The View from the Tem" (The award was for people who suck" I took a similar idea...and the Canary award was hatched. The award is for people or organizations that you want to give the BIRD.

I stopped issuing the award for some time. It was just not that I didn't want to give it, but just couldn't bring myself to do so...kind of strange since I wanted to give so many people the BIRD.

As problems arose here, in the months from the start of the year, I realized that the Canary award was destined to make a comeback.

I had 5 months of comparing to do, and somehow I would need to bring the number of candidates to no more than 4. Usually I only give 3 canaries.

It was tough to set an order for who got what. But at the end of May, I knew who the top two were.

So, the Canary awards for the Month of May, including a "Dishonorable Mention" for a 5th canary...

Dishonorable mention for The Bronze Canary -- drum roll please! -- An idiot who is calling from a California Phone Number. You want that number? 425-xxx-0491. Sorry, I can't give more than that... but you might be able to look it up. They're selling insurance, and they're hounding me--but I'm on the DO NOT CALL LIST.

The Bronze Canary goes to HOUSEHOLD BANK. Oh, yes -- they've won a LOT of canary awards! Tell them to stop calling -- they won't!

The Silver Canary goes to --FANFARE, PLEASE! -- Various collection agencies who refuse to recognize the the fact that when I say "There is no money," that I mean what I say. Now that I'm back on the unemployment line, The frequency of calls will increase to the point where I will have to disconnect the phone.

The GOLD CANARY -- The People who deserve the BIRD more than anyone -- work for my last employer. Let's call 'em "Wendy Orgyson," and "Martin Asskisser." Not their Real names, of course. Wendy is nothing but a bitch, someone who is never able to be pleased. If you ran a 4 minute mile, she'd want it in 3. If you were carrying 150 pounds without assistance, she'd want 250. She's got delusions of grandeur that would make any pyschiatrist cringe, while making him rich.

As for Martin, as my arbitarily chosen surname for him suggests, is nothing but a kiss-ass. He's got no brains of his own, he's got his head so far up his ass that he thinks it's constantly nighttime. And if he ever pulls his head out, he's kissing Wendy's ass. There is something to be said for ethics, but these people ain't got a whit of it. They don't know how to make reasonable demands, they can't even count to ten!

As bad as the pharisees "The law is the law is the law is the law is the rule is the rule is the rule...." they have no compassion for anyone. And Wendy deserves HELL. Martin -- well, Stick HIM in a freak show. That is, if anyone wants to see a sorry excuse for a man. He's a pinheaded lobster, head in the sand like a damned ostrich. He's got the IQ of a shoe (no, why should I insult the shoe?), and head of a scarecrow. The only reason anyone hired HIM is because they felt SORRY for him. Let him ROT. And let Wendy BURN.

So, for May, the Canary finalists are in.

GOLD CANARY to WENDY AND MARTIN

SILVER CANARY to various collection agencies

Bronze Canary to Household Bank

and the Dishonorable Mention to that freaking California idiot who's trying to sell me insurance.

Watch for June's Canaries...coming on July 1 or thereabouts...and possible from an entirely different location.