Rip Van Winkle, reviewed.

I love atomic clocks. They're accurate to within a fraction of a second per 25,000 years. I always know what time it is. I can set a telescope by it. Or a computer. And the government has an online clock to help synchronize your computer. Wonderful.

However, today I feel like Rip Van Winkle. It seems like only yesterday it was 2009! It must have been a very cold day when I feel asleep. I just woke up to find the temp outside on this 25th day of November is 72 degrees. Darn, I missed my aniversary by a day. Interestingly, I don't feel 9 years older.

Atomic clocks are never wrong, correct? I mean it's 5:44 as I write this. The sun is still high in the sky (Which is unusual -- this STILL looks like MN, unless I was moved to a new location.

Since atomic clocks aren't wrong, something has happened. Maybe I moved to the southern hemisphere? My atomic clock indicates this is November 25 , 2018. The world doesn't look at that much different...except for the sun being up at this hour and the current temp.

If I didn't know better, I'd swear it was July, 2009. But atomic clocks can't be wrong.

This information stuns me. Could the computer be off? I've checked. Something is wrong. The computer still shows 2009. Have I entered some sort of bizarre time warp?

Could it be the atomic clock? Is it WRONG? or is the computer off? Wait a minute. That's my dog! My dog is still here. He looks chipper for 21 years...
And the truck still looks as good as it did in 2009. I'll grant you, that's awful, but it hasn't changed.

Boy, I have 9 years of canary awards to give out.

In case you're wondering, I'm only semi-serious here. My atomic clock is off by 9 years, 4 months, and an hour. So, the moral of the story is simple: Don't believe anything except for yourself, unless you want to believe God. But God isn't an atoic clock.